Hero
by dbatman
Summary: Kim was your below average junior, except that she'd give anything up all for Jared's attention. After finally gathering enough courage to tell him how much she loves him, Jared turns her down and leaves her heart bleeding. Will tables turn for her?
1. Preface

**Preface**

I was dumbstruck. Bingo finished all five chicken legs in merely a minute.

"Wow, you have some appetite, boy." I smoothened the brown fur on his head and scanned my room for any scratch paper I could use to pick the bones up. There was none on my bed, on my desk, on my vanity desk, but there was an intermediate sheet coated with dried mud below my closet. I reached for it and saw that it was Jared's math homework I stealthily smuggled and kissed last school year.

"This will do." I placed it on my hand and reached for the first bone, but Bingo's raised paw stopped me. I tried doing it on the second bone, but he stopped me too.

"C'mon, boy! You don't want to live in a dirty room!" I reached for the third bone, but Bingo stopped me again, and took Jared's homework out of my hand and into his mouth. He walked to my desk, placed it there, took Derek's love letter instead and dropped it on my hand.

"I need scratch paper, Bingo. This isn't scratch." Bingo walked away and rummaged through my board game tray. He took one card in his mouth and walked to my desk to get Jared's homework too.

"What is it?" Bingo withdrew the card and the homework out of his mouth and placed it by my knees. I took the card that was placed beside Jared's name and read it. "Second chance".

"No, Bingo. No more second chances for him." Bingo fell on the floor and whimpered.


	2. Pitiful

**Pitiful**

If there was one thing I hated more than anything else, it would definitely be dogs.

"It's okay, Kim. Just calm down, everything will be just fine."

"I might die, daddy! _I might die_!" Whatever the nurse was pouring over my humongous wound, it made the unbearable swelling pain spread all throughout my right leg. It has been the fifth time in this month that a dog has bitten me, and the fifth time I'm at risk with rabies.

"Okay, little girl. This won't hurt, it will be just like an ant bite." The old, fat nurse assured me. It was useless. I got anti-rabies shots for a gazillion times now, and they weren't anything close to an ant bite.

"Please, _please_! I'm sure there's no rabies!" The tears from my eyes gushed down my cheeks rapidly.

"Your wound is too deep. The deepest one I have ever seen, actually. It's impossible that there is no rabies, honey."

"_No_!" I roared. All the people in the emergency room looked at me. I was sure that I looked like a big baby, but that didn't matter now.

"Bobby, I think we need to strap this one in."

"Sure, Brenda." A guy who looked like a drug addict only with green nurse clothes suddenly pushed my arms down the bed and strapped them there tightly.

"Here's the tray, Brends."

"Thank you, Ally." The nurse unwrapped the packaging that contained the injection. I was petrified—the needle was longer, thinner and sharper than before. The nurse squeezed some of the fluid out and dabbed cotton buds with alcohol on my arm. I knew what that meant. The swelling on my leg became more severe, but I didn't care. I squirmed, twisted and turned-- anything to escape the needle.

"Kim, darling, it won't hurt. You did this a lot of times already. You're a big girl, honey."

"_Daddy_!" It was too late. The long needle already pierced through my skin, and it felt like it was piercing right through my bones as well.

"We need nine more, Ally." The thought of this pain times nine drowned my whole body of blood. The bright fluorescent lamp that hung from the roof dimmed as the seconds passed.

**- -**

I woke up to a bright morning, and the blinding sunlight from the windows hurt my eyes. Something told me that I wasn't supposed to be here, that I was forgetting something.

"Good morning, beautiful!" My dad's voice suddenly boomed from the left. I unconsciously jerked my legs in shock and a burning sensation suddenly made itself known. Now I remember.

"Hi, dad." I heard gentle purring as something hairy frayed against my elbows.

"Good morning, Whiskers." I brushed my cat's black fur and it purred more.

"You better keep her in the house this time. The dogs might attack her again."

"Yes, da- _ow!_" My arms suddenly hurt like hell when I flexed it to give Whiskers a longer pat.

"You better be careful with your arm, Kim. You know, I really don't know why you risk your life for a cat."

"Of course, dad. She's my best friend."

"_O, Kim_! Then you better expand your circle of friends."

"Nah. Hey, dad, aren't you late for work?"

"I told them I'd be two hours late."

"What about me?"

"Two hours late, too." I groaned. The one thing I hated next to dogs was school. There, I was a nobody, a loser, a nerd, a weirdo, a loner…you name it.

"How can I go to school if I'm like _this_?"

"You don't have to stand up. Just stay in your seat and I'll bring you your lunch in the classroom." Whew. That spared me from sitting alone in the café, like always.

"You dress-up and fix yourself, sweetheart. I'll be waiting for you in the car."

The sight of the schoolyard was creeping nearer and nearer, and my stomach lurched wildly. I had a perfect attendance, but the whole routine of being nervous each day never changed.

"Stay there. I'll carry you to your room." Dad slammed his car door closed and ran to open mine. "Dad, I can walk." Too late. My dad already scooped me up into his small arms and carried me across the schoolyard.

"Good morning, sir Yoda."

"Henry, jokes like those aren't funny. You better stop doing that beca-"

"Hey, hey look everyone! It's Professor Frodo and his little pork dumpling!" The group the bully was sitting with roared with laughter. This is why I hated school so much. My dad was just the most hated teacher here on campus-- and I was his daughter.

"Dad, you can put me down. I don't need this."

"It's okay, honey. Look, we're already climbing up the stairs. Just a few more steps and we'll be inside." My dad kicked the door open and walked across the hallway swarming with devils. Even if my eyes were fixed down on the floor out of embarrassment, I could still feel their eyes on my back.

"Damn it. Alex told me a car hit him. Why is the troll still alive?"

"You know Alex. He's a joker."

"_Damn_! I was dancing all night because I thought it was true!" My chest sank. It was painful, more painful than rabies shots, to hear your schoolmates wish that your father was dead. They always called him mean stuff like Yoda, Frodo, troll, elf, dwarf, and midget. It wasn't his fault that he was born with the dwarf disease--he never had a choice.

"Thank you, Mr. Ramos. I could take it from here now." We already reached the burning pits of hell that was my classroom.

"_Aww_! I thought he'd be absent!" Everyone groaned as he gently placed me on my desk.

"Good morning, class! Beautiful day isn't it?"

"It was…a while ago." A roar of laughter followed Mark's joke. Tears were already starting to well up in my eyes.

"No more nasty jokes, please. We have no time for that because I'm giving you a pop quiz on chapter nineteen to thirty-seven."

"_You suck, you midget_!" Everyone started laughing again, but I didn't pay any attention to that. I was looking at my father, his eyes were teary like mine and his lips were quivering. I wanted to shout at all of my classmates. They were judging a man they didn't know. But if I did, I'd get bullied twice as much.

"Man, why does your dad have to suck so hard, Kim?" Stacey, my popular blonde seatmate, asked me with bitterness in every word. I simply shrugged at her though deep inside, I wanted to pull her hair right out of her scalp.

"Uhh, umm. B-but before we take the pop quiz, I have some news to tell y-y-you." Seeing my dad trying to stop himself from crying made my tears fall down.

"We have a new student. Not really new, but somehow new. He was from the other section but he swapped with Roy so he'll be staying with us for the remainder of this year. Jared, please come in and introduce yourself."

I've never felt this way before. My stomach lurched—in a good kind of way. My heartbeat raced faster and I felt very weak as a handsome man stepped in. The chocolate brown hair above his forehead was gelled into one spike that loomed forward, and the rest of his shiny mane was cropped in a breathtaking way. He had pitch-black eyes, a sharp, angular nose and lips that were curved into a smile that can kill. He had a lean, muscular body beneath his perfectly tanned skin and the tight, white shirt he was wearing exposed his broad chest and his steel abs.

"Hi, I'm Jared Wilson, but you can call me Jared or Jet." The deep, alluring voice boomed throughout the whole room. I could listen to it everyday.

"I hope you enjoy your stay here, Jared. Please take the seat beside Stacey." _Ugh_! One little seat away from him!

The piercing ring of the bell suddenly echoed throughout the hallway outside.

"Woops. I'm out of time. Looks like the quiz will have to be given another day. Bye, class! Be good to Jared!" They were already being good to him, especially the girls.

"So, Jared, where did you get that body?" Stacey asked him in a voice I bet she wanted to sound seductive.

"I don't know. Maybe I was just born with it." He bragged. All the girls giggled in delight. I was too, giggling to myself.


	3. Stalker

**Stalker**

6:45 PM. Fifteen more minutes and my mom would be here. I usually read my textbooks while waiting for her, but this Thursday night was a different one. Instead of reading, I kept on thinking of Jared all night. I know it's pretty stupid, knowing that he doesn't even know I exist, but I couldn't do anything about it. Each time I'd get started on Science, my thoughts suddenly lurk near him, and it was hard abstaining from that.

"Mom's here, sweety!" Dad ran down the stairs and raced for the door. I followed him. Who knows what mom has for me this time?

"Walter! Kim!" My mom exclaimed as she climbed down the cab.

"I'll help you with your luggage, hon." My dad raced down the porch and took the luggage out of the driver's hands. He was busy gawking at the beach ahead of him.

"Hi, love." Mom pecked my cheeks and hugged me.

"I missed you, ma." I kissed her back and looked at her. My parents always told me that I inherited her good looks, but I was aware that it wasn't true.

My mom is half Chinese and half Filipino. She was flawless. Her jet-black hair was smooth and shiny as silk, her small eyes allured every man in La Push, her small, pointed nose was perfect and her very red lips were as soft as cotton. She was slender, 5'8, but with high heels, she was a six-footer, which made people around La Push think that her marriage to my dad was ironic.

I was her total opposite. I was coated with pimples on my forehead and blackheads on my nose. My hair was quite past shoulder length and black, but not as black and silky as hers. My eyes were small too, but they didn't go well with my face. My nose was sharp, but it was too long, like it belonged to an older woman and my lips had nothing special about it. In medical check-ups, I was considered obese and I stand only 4'11 tall. Looking at my mom sometimes hurt me deep inside. I'm 16, and the leap of change that would lead me to look like her never came.

"Let's go inside. I have a _lot_ for you." The sadness my low self-esteem brought was washed away by excitement. Having a flight attendant for a mother was interesting because of the loads of things she gets you from all around the world.

"Let's see. I bought you some chocolate, candies, shoes from Prada, some tops from D&G, bags from Saks and Gucci." I sighed. "What's wrong, honey?"

"Mom, I know those things are so high-end, but it would surely look cheap when I wear them."

"You are so negative! You just didn't mature yet. Hey, look at this. It's a sleeveless turtleneck I got you from the Philippines…and it only costs two dollars!" I looked at the turquoise turtleneck my mom was holding up. Wearing it would surely reveal my curves, if I had any.

"Ma, I'm too fat to fit in that. It would look better on you."

"I should stop getting you clothes. You get too pessimistic whenever I do. Here, I got you ten copies of Teen Vogue." That hit the spot. "Thanks, ma!" I threw my arms around her and carried the stack up to my room.

"Let's see." I jumped on my bed and started flipping the pages wildly. An article in the fifth issue caught my eye.

**- - - **

"No, Mark, you throw the football like this." Jared firmly placed the ball in his hands and spun his arm for two times. He thrust the ball out of the field with hot, intense eyes. I was going to melt any second.

"Okay, class. It's dismissal." Mr. Ramos shouted. I ran as fast as I could towards the benches to get my bag. It was hard squeezing in with the rest.

"Ohh, sorry." I hit someone while I was on my way to get my bag. I looked straight ahead and nearly trembled when I saw a sweaty chest right in front of my eyes.

"Aight." The voice from above was no doubt, Jared's. I looked up at his angelic face and smiled at him.

"Uhh, I'll be getting my bag now, okay?"

"Huh? What? Sure! Okay! Yes, sir!" What the freaking hell did I just say? Jared looked at me in a freaked out kind of way, and the way he raised his eyebrow was so irresistible.

Though I looked more stupid than before, I felt fulfilled. Striking a formal conversation with your crush was one of the tips Teen Vogue suggested to get a guy to notice you.

I pushed through the crowd to get my bag, and I didn't mind the offending responses they gave me. I had to get it as fast as I could, before Jared gets out of school.

"Let's go home?" My dad offered me his hand as I raced past the hallway.

"No can do, dad. I have a Social Studies project to do in my classmate's house. I'll be home before 6!" I'm sure he wanted to ask details, but that didn't matter now. All that mattered was being successful at stalking Jared so I could know what things interests him.

The heavens were one with me today. He was just standing on the sidewalk, talking to other boys who looked a bit like him. He bade them goodbye after a few minutes and walked to his house, which was just three blocks away from the school.

"Hey, mum." Jared kissed his old mother by the time he reached the old fashioned living room. I positioned myself outside the living room window and crouched down so he couldn't see me.

"I'm just going to do my math homework then I'll be going to Port Angeles with Jacob later." Jared climbed up the wooden staircase, perhaps to his room. There was no way I could see him now, unless I climb the tree that grew up to the second floor.

One more step and I'll be in heaven. I clutched at the tree branch and pulled myself up. Finally, after minutes of back pain, I made it to his window.

His room was big, but very cluttered unlike mine. Clothes were draped on every surface, including his drum set. Posters of bands covered the wooden panels of his room. Other than that, he was nowhere to be found in his room.

"Yes, Stacey. I'll fetch you." I suddenly heard his voice. He was on his bed; phone in hand, directly below the window that's why I didn't see him a while ago.

"I told my mum that I'll be in Port Angeles with Jake so we better stick to that. See you later, sexy thing." _Sexy thing_? I stomped my left foot and the branch I was stepping on snapped. _Crap. _I was hanging in mid-air, and my only hope to stay alive was the tree branch I was hanging on to.

"Damn Trig! I'm gonna rape whoever invented this wretched subject!" He stomped his way to his desk and scribbled stuff on his intermediate sheet. "Damn it, damn it, _damn it_!" He threw his pen on the floor and shrugged his shirt off. It wasn't a big deal, I mean, I saw his chest earlier. He unzipped his pants after that, and pulled them off.

"_Oh shit_!" I shouted. I didn't notice that my palms were getting slippery due to my sweating. My hands slipped away from the branch and I fell on the rose bush below, my back hit some branches in the process.

"_OWWWW_!"

"Are you alright, child?" Jared's mother busted out of the door and rushed to help me get up.

"Back…. hurts. Thorns…on my b-b-_ack_." I moaned. She gently assisted me up and I felt so embarrassed. My weight was hard to pull.

"I think you broke some bones. _Oh my! Your back is bleeding_!"

"I-it's okay, Mrs. Wilson."

"Do you want be to bring you to the hospital?"

"Mom, what was that?" Jared called from inside.

"N-no. I better get going." I shrugged her hands away and limped for it. It was painful, for now it was more painful than having your father insulted. I could feel a bone protrude out of my skin and the thorns on my back felt like thumbtacks.

"Dad-_eee_!" I collapsed on the floor by the time I reached the house.

"Kim, what the _hell_ happened to you?"

"L-long story. Please take me to the hospital." I told him breathlessly.


	4. Confession

**Confession**

The driving time from my house to the school usually took five minutes, but it seemed like years this time. I was itching to see him again, the brown haired boy who was summoned out of my dreams.

"Honey, are you sure you can make it to school today?"

"Dad, I had Saturday and Sunday to heal. I'll be just fine."

"Are you _really_ sure? Does your back still ache?" Yes, yes it did. It hurt like hell, actually, but it's all worth going to school for.

"No, dad. It doesn't ache anymore." I lied.

"You know, you've been acting strange lately. I have never seen you refuse staying at home. You even faked illnesses just to skip school and now you have the perfect excuse and here you are, on your way to school."

"Of course, dad. My junior days are numbered. Better cherish 'em."

"Whatever you say, honey." Finally, after a million years, the car hovered to a stop in front of the schoolyard.

"Bye, dad. See you later in Trig." I climbed out of the car and slammed my door shut.

Walking up the stairs was really hard today. The back brace I was wearing prevented me from bending, so I had to climb it like a poised ballerina.

By the time I flung the door open, Jared was suddenly right in front of me. The rapid beating of my heart started again and my cheeks suddenly warmed up.

"Oh, hey, Kim." I looked up at Jared. His lips were redder than usual, and so were his cheeks. My stomach lurched wildly and my head felt very light.

"Hi, Jared." This moment better last.

"Kim?" A deep voice called from behind. It startled me—it sounded too beastly and too loud. As much as I hated it, I looked away from Jared to see who my caller was.

He was muscular, too muscular that he looked like he could crush me. He was like The Hulk's incarnation or something, except that he wasn't green but tan.

"Umm, hi?"

"Kim, it's me, Paul. From the book lovers club in middle school, don't you remember?" I suddenly had a blast from the past. I remembered my days as a sixth grader, when I had no friends except for the skinny, asthmatic seventh grader, Paul. He was my best friend, until he suddenly had to go to high school. The man in front of me couldn't be him. He looked too well built.

"Paul?"

"_Yes_!" I took one step back as the big man was about to hug me. Paul felt too hot, like I was hugging a steel chair from an outdoor café in Miami. 

"_Ouch_!" I unconsciously exclaimed. He was crushing my already crushed bones and it started to hurt excruciatingly again.

"Woops, sorry." He let go.

"You know Kim?" Jared said out of nowhere.

"Yeah, we were club mates back in middle school, and best friends too. You know her?"

"My classmate." He said flatly.

"Ohh."

"Hey, I gotta go for now. I forgot something at home. See you later?"

"See you later, Jared." I watched Jared climb down the stairs; his hair was blown by the wind.

"Do you still watch Star Trekk?"

"Yes." I answered him awkwardly. He just didn't look like the Paul I knew.

"You're freaked out, I know."

"Yeah, sorry."

"I'm still the same, Kim. It's just the shell that's different."

"Don't worry. I'll get used to it." I tried my best to flash him a smile.

"So, you're in to Jared, huh?" His face was in a smug. How the hell did he know?

"No. Where the heck did you get that?" Paul touched my palm and I looked at it. Jared's name was written all over it.

"Ugh. Just don't tell him. You two seem close."

"We will be close soon. Now, not that much."

"Close soon?"

"You won't understand. Anyway, Kim, I hope you see why I'm telling you this although it may seem wrong in all ways. You better quit liking Jared."

"_Why_?" I automatically blurted the question out.

"He's a jerk, Kim. He likes it when girls like him and he acts like he likes the girl back so the girl would like him more." I didn't believe him because of two things. One, Jared didn't look like he was a jerk and the other reason though it hurts to think about it was two; he doesn't act like he likes me back.

"No offence, Paul but, I don't believe you."

"It's not my problem if you don't but always remember that I warned you." He winked at me.

"I'm sorry."

"Nah, it's okay. As long as you're happy, then I'm fine with it." Now it didn't feel awkward, he was the Paul back in middle school.

"Thanks. Hey, can you help me? I need to know Jared's locker code so I could replace his homework with this." I pulled the correctly answered Trig homework out of my pocket.

"Okay, but he doesn't deserve this." He sighed.

**- - **

"Hey, Kim. Thanks for the homework." Jared suddenly sank down in front of me. It took me a few seconds to compose my frenzied self.

"Sorry, what?" I hope I looked convincing.

"The Trig homework." He dropped the sheet beside my apple.

"I…don't know what you're talking about. Sorry."

"I found this in my locker a while ago so I asked Stacey if the penmanship was familiar. She says it's yours."

"Ohh. Sorry, but I've never seen that paper." My heart was beating faster because of two things—because I might get busted and because he looked so handsome when he's confused.

"But your name's on it." He flipped the paper and I saw what I kept on writing last night. 'Mrs. Kim Wilson.' _Shit_, I didn't know I wrote it down on that paper. I'd kill to have the earth swallow me alive right now. I rummaged through my head for any fake excuses.

"It's okay. I don't mind. I'm flattered, actually. Thank you." I don't know how it happened, but Jared's hand was suddenly on my shoulder and it slowly slid down to my hand. I felt like I was floating and I felt like I was floating higher when I looked at him. Part of his mouth was curved up into a breathtaking half smile. 

"So, anyway, I was hoping that you'd help me with my homework more often."

"Sure. Anytime." I told him breathlessly. 

I spent most of the week doing my homework and Jared's. I'd give it to him the next day, and his warm smile would make staying up until 3 AM worth it. Today was the last day of school, but it was certainly not the last day with Jared. My class planned a class outing in First Beach right after Science, and that's when I plan to tell Jared everything. Teen Vogue says that being friends should go before admitting it, and he was my friend now, thanks to the whole homework thing. 

Mr. Taft asked us to write an essay on what we learned in his science class, and I was done with that. I spent the period drawing Stacey in a whore costume to kill the remaining minutes.

After minutes that seemed like an eternity, the bell finally rang outside the hall and everyone jumped out of their seats.

"Happy summer, class." No one greeted Mr. Taft back. 

I ran out of the school as fast as I could. The long path to First Beach curved downward so I let the force of gravity freely pull my running legs down.

It was indeed, summer. I could feel it, smell it, see it, hear it and taste it. The gigantic waves crashed down my feet as I walked across the sandy shore, the salty smell of the sea breeze was everywhere, birds perched on the driftwood logs, the laughter of children echoed throughout the beach and the snow cone stand was open, once again. I immediately took my clothes off since my swim suit was just under them. 

"Woohoo!"

"Summer, here we come!" My classmates emerged from the path and dropped their belongings near mine.

"Who the hell invited her?"

"Man, it's like a horror movie seeing her in a bikini. Doesn't she know that she's _fat_?"

"I bet her daddy's with her."

"Bummer!"

Tears suddenly appeared in my eyes. It was a class gimmick and I'm part of the class. Why wasn't I welcome? I looked at my body. I _did_ look horrible in a bikini. The layers of my fats were exposed. I put my shirt on again and wiped the tears that might fall down away. _Stop crying, Kim. Just tell Jared what you feel about him and you'll leave._

"You can do this." I told myself. I took in one breath of air and walked bravely to Jared. He was with the popular group, which made admitting it harder.

"Hey, Jared."

"Yow."

"Eww, Jared. You talk to _her_?" _Crap_. If killing weren't illegal, I would have dissected Stacey alive.

"Can we be left alone for a while? I need to tell him something."

"_Ooooh_!" The group chorused.

"Why don't you tell it while we're here? You need witnesses you know." Stacey laughed.

"No, thank you."

"You know what I really like? Brave girls. Just don't mind them, Kim." Jared assured me. It was easy trusting those sincere eyes, but I still felt nervous and wheezy.

"Tell him! Tell him!" The crowd suddenly grew bigger. I looked back at the shore; no one was there anymore. The whole class was _here_. My heart palpitated rapidly, I started sweating cold sweat and I felt like crying. This wasn't how I pictured it, it was far worse. I ran away from Jared, but the boys kept on pushing me closer so I couldn't escape.

"What is it, Kim?" He smiled at me again.

"Never mind."

"No, please. Tell me." His voice was seductive.

"Jared…I."

"_Yeehee_!" The jeering got louder and louder. It was the perfect time; no one could hear me except him.

"Jared, I love you." That was the biggest regret of my life. The jeering suddenly stopped when I started, so they heard it. I kept on thinking about turning back time, even for just five minutes ago. If I weren't so stupid, I wouldn't be here.

"You have some nerve, Kim. If I were as fugly as you are, I'd never have the courage to admit it to Jared. Reality check: you're hopeless." Everyone laughed at Stacey's statement, including him. My heart broke into pieces and one tear slid down my cheeks.

"Kim, honey. I'm really sorry but I don't like you back. I only tolerated you because you ace my papers. I mean, _c'mon_! You're fat, ugly, not to mention, mini me's daughter. I would never hit on a girl like you, unless you were the last one on earth, maybe I will." He roared in laughter. I couldn't take it anymore. All the tears gushed down freely, out of hurt and out of anger. I did a lot for him—I broke my back for him, slept late all for him, and even endured this hell for him. Paul was right, he was a jerk. I raised a fist to hit his face but my classmates pushed me down the sand. 

"_Oww_!" I cried as a lot of sand hit my eyes. I was nearly blind, and I could only open my eyes a bit. I crawled on the ground to get my bag as my classmates laughed at how pathetic I looked like. That didn't hurt now, something else hurt even more. As soon as I got my bag, I ran up to my house and cried my weary heart out.


	5. Change

**Change**

"Stupid alarm clock." I muttered to myself as I threw the alarm clock against the wall. It shattered into weird mechanical pieces and woke Whiskers up.

"Sorry, Whiskers." I got out of bed and dragged my feet across the room. It's 6:55 AM, and my parents will be home from their 4-month summer honeymoon any minute. It was also the day I dreaded and wished would never come—the day when classes resume.

I locked myself and cried in my room every day of summer, starved myself out of depression and broke all the mirrors in the house so I won't be able to see the insect repellent that was my face. Being ugly was the hardest thing to be—it was hard being me. 

I took my backpack on the way to the kitchen and started crying again. My backpack was the scarce symbol of school, a place where people like me were discriminated and treated like animals. I thought it would end when he came, when my hero came; but he was just like the rest. What everyone said was true: love can feel good like heaven, but it could also hurt like hell. I would never love again, never again in my whole life.

I suddenly heard the sound of a hovering cab. "We're home!" My parents called out from outside. I forcefully dragged myself to the porch. I don't know why, but carrying myself was harder these days since I always felt heavy. _Well, duh you're heavy. You're a fat ass._

"Hi mom. Hi, dad." I told them flatly.

"_Holy cow, Kim! What happened to you_?"

"I know I'm ugly, dad. You don't have to rub it in." I slammed the door in front of his face, not caring if he'll ground me or not. I grounded myself, anyway, for being ugly.

After taking a shower, I dried myself up and rummaged through my closet for something to wear.

"Maybe this will do." I told myself as I picked up a turquoise shirt. I wore it as soon as I finished putting my jeans and sneakers on. All that's left to do now is comb my hair. I slid the comb from the top until the end and raised an eyebrow. My hair was way longer than before. Avoiding mirrors surely stops you from seeing your development. 

I was all set. I took one step forward then my jeans fell down. "What the hell?" I tugged them up and took another step forward. The same thing happened.

"Ma, do you have any spare jeans? My jeans keep on falling off." I shouted.

"Just use the ones I bought you last time. See if they fit you now." I sighed to myself and walked to my closet. The jeans that my mother bought me were too tight so I cramped them all up in one plastic bag at the very bottom of the closet. I took the first one I saw out and wore it. It fit perfectly.

"Bye mom. See you later, dad." I kissed them as I whirred past the living room.

"Are you sure you don't want to hitch a ride with me?"

"No, dad. I'll be fine on my own." I closed the door behind me and climbed down the porch stairs. The real reason behind me not hitching a ride with dad was because I wanted to skip the subjects before his. That would give me more time to be far from hell. 

**- - - **

"_SOMEONE MURDER ME_!" I screamed at the top of my lungs as I reached the schoolyard. Dad's period was right after recess, so I had to come here by recess time. Recess was just about to start.

I opened the doors to hell, and I felt like crying when I saw the hallway after four short months. _Another damned school year. _

The students were just leaving their classrooms a few seconds after I came in. Not so long after that, I already saw my classmates. They all looked exactly the same, except that it seemed like they shrank over the summer. Most of them were staring at me when they passed by, and it pierced my self-esteem again. Stacey looked at me from head to toe, grabbed her best friend and whispered something in her ear. 

"Damn it, I know I'm ugly, _okay? Just shut the fuck up_!" I screamed at her. She looked at me in a weird and frightened way, but I didn't mind her after that.

I ran to the café and sat down in my usual seat, with no food this time. Ever since my 'great depression', I lost my appetite and ate only once a day.

"Hey, miss. Want us to keep you company?" Mark and his friends suddenly sat down beside me. He placed both of his hands on my arms and I could feel his touch when I should have not. _I was wearing my shirt right?_ I looked at where the sleeves were supposed to be. I was dumbstruck—I got the sleeveless turtleneck instead.

"Damn it, Mark. I've had enough. Aren't you content with what you did to me last month? Piss off, you ass."

"Sorry, what are you talking about?" He asked me in a polite, un-Markish kind of way.

"Go talk to yourself." I told him darkly. I gave him five seconds to leave, but he didn't so I pushed him out of the chair with his friends.

"Wow, that new chick's pretty weird." One of his friends said.

I was terribly annoyed so I rose from my seat and decided to go to the classroom to be left alone. From the corner of my eye, I could see most of the students stare at me. When will this ever stop?

"Hi, honey."

"Hi, dad." I told him as soon as I took my seat.

"Don't you want to take your recess?"

"I'm kinda full. Listen, dad, I'm sorry about a while ago."

"It's okay. You know, what you thought I was saying wasn't what I wanted to tell you."

"Huh?"

"It's like the coolest movie _ever_!" My classmates suddenly started entering the classroom. I laid my head on my folded arms so they wouldn't be able to see me.

"Okie, are you all present?" My dad asked after a few minutes.

"Yes, sir." They all said lazily.

"Okay, let's start. I'm glad to see you all again, class!"

"The feeling's not mutual." I shot Stacey a basilisk's glare.

"I see some of you changed this summer. Let's see…Emma got blonde hair, Jason got braces, Mia and Stacey got tanned and…_Jared_!" My father suddenly gasped. My hands clenched to a fist by the time I heard the damned name.

"Jared, _you've changed a lot_!" Out of curiosity, I tilted my body forward to get a glimpse of him. Someone else was in Jared's seat. He was the same, except that he was even more muscular and bigger than before. And he looked more like a gym model than a student. His chest looked like they were going to burst out of his already tight, white shirt any second and he was quite reddish, like he's sick with fever. My heart started beating rapidly again, so I tried piercing it with my ball pen.

"Thank you, sir." His voice became deeper. All the girls sighed dreamily as he spoke. 

"Sir, won't you introduce the new student to us?" Mark asked. I looked around the room. No one seemed new.

"We have no new student."

"Then who is she?" I couldn't tell whom he was pointing because he was behind me.

"Ahh. I didn't recognize her last morning too. That's your old classmate, Kim."

"_No shit_!" He suddenly exclaimed. All heads turned to me in a snap, examining my face intently. It felt very uncomfortable.

"Alright, I get it. I got more ugly. Now will you all please stop that?" If dad weren't here, I would have sworn my head off.

"Kim, is that really you?"

"Yes." I told Stacey with teeth clenched together.

"It can't be."

I buried my face in my hair so they'd stop it. My chest felt heavier, I felt like crying again.

"Back to business people! Today I'll be giving you a brief summary of this year's lessons. Get your books, please, and read the Table of Contents for a while." I unzipped my backpack and brought my thick, math book out. By the time I already found the Table of Contents page, all my classmate's heads were finally glued to their books. There was one head though, that wasn't bowed down but was turned to me, like it was a magnet and I was too. I discreetly withdrew my eyes from the book and looked at whoever he or she was. It was Jared, looking at me wide-eyed, like he saw something he was looking for forever.


	6. Karma

**Karma**

"Hey, Kim." The voice was familiar. I spun around to look at my caller. It was Jared.

"What do you need?" I looked away.

"Are you free tonight? I need someone to go to Port Angeles with."

"_Look_, if you need answer keys, just tell me. I'll go copy it from my dad's lecture notebook. You don't have to go left and right, Jared. Just go straight to the freaking point." There was a long, awkward silence between us. I was about to tell him something to break it, but when I looked into his eyes, he looked like he was in severe pain.

"I'm really sorry about last time, Kim." Agony leaked from every word in his voice. It was risky falling for that; he was better than an actor.

"Nice acting." I sneered at him.

"I'm dead serious! I _am_ sorry. I'll do anything to make it up to you."

"I thought of you every stinking second last year, Jared. I broke my back, left it bleeding and went to school bearing that one hell of a pain just to see you. I stayed up late and slept in class just to do your essays and homework so I can see you freaking smile at me! And most of all, I had my self-esteem stepped on just so you could know how much I felt for you that time. Heck, maybe I have no self-esteem anymore. Do you think it's easy making up for all _that!_" I was left panting like a dog, but all I got from Jared was a big, successful grin.

"Wow, how insensitive." I rolled my eyes.

"It's not that, Kim. It just feels…so _odd_ when I hear you say those things. Like there are butterflies in my stomach or something."

"Dude, stop being cheesy. You're good at acting and I hope you're happy now that you got praised for that." I swiftly turned away from him, but as soon as I took my first few steps, he grabbed me by the arm and abruptly pulled me near his chest. I was face to face with him, unlike before when my face could only level up to his chest. There was perhaps only half an inch that separated my face from his, and his hot breath fanned against my lips. I struggled away from his feverish grip, but it was too firm that my bones might break if I struggle even more.

"Please, Kim. _Please_. Go to Port Angeles with me." He asked me with pleading eyes. My cold heart softened up. I had the strong urge to touch his red cheeks, to tell him that I'll go with him and hug him tightly after that. I looked at his face, and then my heart froze again when I remembered that it was the face that betrayed me and shattered my heart into pieces.

"_Kim, honey. I'm really sorry but I don't like you back. I only tolerated you because you ace my papers. I mean, c'mon! You're fat, ugly, not to mention, mini me's daughter. I would never hit on a girl like you, unless you were the last one on earth, maybe I will." _I remembered it all clearly, like it was a movie being replayed for the second time. He could do it again.

"Let me go." I told him coldly. To my surprise, he did; but a part of me missed the way he gripped me.

I ran out of the school and went out of its boundaries; the strong urge to look back swelled in every cell of my body. I opened the car door and climbed in.

"Are you okay, honey?"

"Wa…what?"

"You look like you lost a lotto or something."

"Nah. It's just a bad day, as always." I looked out of the open window, with no intentions of looking at anything in particular. But something that reflected on the side mirror caught my eye.

"_GOODNESS GRACIOUS_!" I shrieked. The car made a screeching sound as it abruptly hovered to a stop.

"What? _What_?"

"Dad…who the _hell_ is that girl?"

"Who?" I pointed a shaking finger towards the mirror.

"_Whew_! I thought I hit something. You better calm your reactions down, Kim. You're going to give me a heart attack. That's _you_. That's why people thought you were a new student." Dad started the car again.

I hesitantly touched my cheeks. It was real, what I saw in the mirror. They were prominent and rosy, unlike before when it was chubby and big. My hair was perfect like mom's, my lips looked soft and had perfect curves, my face grew longer and lost its blemishes and I was way taller than before. I looked like a seventeen-year-old supermodel.

"We're home." My dad announced. I was dying to step out of the car and look at myself in mom's mirror, which I spared when I was wrecking the rest.

I jumped out of the car and ran like I've never run before towards the door, but something hideous was pacing in front of it.

"Shit, dad! _There's a humongous dog by the door_!" I ran back inside the car and closed all the windows and doors. The dog had chocolate brown fur and was big as a horse. It ran beside the car and screeched its long nails against the window.

"_Dad_!" The dog was barking at me, exposing his set of dagger-like teeth. I could imagine those sharp things piercing through my legs and I felt blood rush up my body as I did. It didn't look anything like a dog when it was near; it looked like a gigantic wolf. 

"Okay, here's what we'll do." My dad shouted from the inside. "On three, you come out of the car and I'll carry you home. Ready?" I deliberated for a while. The thing was too big that it could surely steal me away from my father and bite me like a doll. But then I remembered this segment on TV when this girl stayed in her car for too long and suffocated. I'd rather get bitten—I was used to it.

"Ready." I told him hesitantly.

"One, two, _three_." I barged out of the car and jumped into my dad's arms, heart palpitating rapidly. The brown thing followed my running father with no effort.

"Run faster, dad! _Run_!" I frantically screamed at him and realized that I was unconsciously hitting him like a horse. We finally reached the door and we closed it just when the thing was about to enter the house. 

**- - **

"Shut the hell up!" I closed my window as I finished shouting at the howling dog. Even if the rain was pouring down violently, his howl was still clear as a bell. I took my pillows and stomped my way to my dad's room.

"Hey, dad. Mind if I sleep with you tonight?" I was surprised when he rose in an instant. It usually took some minutes of slapping before he wakes up.

"Sure. That dog's getting really annoying, Kim. Is the pound open at this hour?"

"Nah, I don't think so. I laid down at 10 and it's 4 now. That dog never stops."

"I pity him a bit, though. There's a storm outside and it's out in the cold."

"He'll make his way back to his owner, I'm sure." Man, who would ever want to own a beast?

"I don't know, honey. It seems like it likes you."

"Tss." I rolled my eyes. "Night, dad." I lay down on the bed beside him, trying my best to ignore the seemingly pained howling of the dog.

**- - **

"Take your seats, everyone!" I followed my dad into the classroom. There was a big chunk of girls in one corner; perhaps the one they were surrounding was deep inside their circle.

"O, Jared! You're sick as a dog!"

"Do you want to sleep in my house tonight? I could take good care of you."

"Aww! Poor Jared!"

"I said take your seats, everyone." My dad repeated sternly. All the girls dispersed and unwillingly took their seats, revealing a very sick Jared as they did. His hair wasn't gelled today; it was left on its natural way. I hate to admit it, but he looked better than his already incomparable self. His lips were red as berries and were a bit inflamed, and big purple eye bags lay beneath his sleepy eyes.

"_Achoo_!"

"Jared, are you alright?" My dad asked.

"Yes, sir."

"I think you need to go home."

"_No_!" His loud, instant reply surprised us.

"Well, we can't have you here. We might get your sickness. I'll have to send you to the clinic. Who do you want to accompany you?"

"Kim." He said without sparing a second to think. Dad looked at me, then I shook my head. He looked at me in a sharper way so I had no choice.

"Let's go." I said lazily. I unwillingly rose from my seat and walked to his chair. He stood up, placed one heavy arm around my shoulders and we both walked out into deserted hallway. He was hot as fire, his body heat still managed to pass right through my sweater. Though my back was facing them, I could tell that my girl classmates were bewildered.

"What's up with you?" I asked him as the door flung closed behind us.

"Flu, sore throat, fever, lack of sleep." He said as he blew his stuffy nose.

"How did you get all those things?"

"Crazy things you do out of love." I paused for a while to think. I don't recall any drastic things he did for me yesterday. _What the hell, Kim? It could be another girl! You're not who he's talking about! He's just acting, remember? _A surge of pain went through me as my conscience spoke.

"Who's the girl?" I asked him bitterly.

"You."

"Yeah, right. I don't reckon anything you did for me to get you these illnesses."

"You'll never know." He said in a mystique voice. "I bet you were annoyed last night, huh?" He spoke again.

"What?"

"That brown dog didn't let you sleep."

"How did you know about that?" I felt my forehead fold into creases.

"I have my sources." He said proudly. "I'm just like that dog, Kim. I'll be standing in the pouring rain all night for you. I'll never give up until you take me."

"Once again, nice acting." I shrugged his arm off by the time we reached the clinic door.

"Just remember what I said. I'll never give up 'til you take me. See you tonight, Kim." _Tonight_, I wondered. Nevertheless, I walked away, not minding the nonsense that came out of his mouth.


	7. Bingo

Bingo

**Bingo**

I was finally home after the long hours I spent in the library, reading books while waiting for dad to finish checking papers. My eyes widened in curiosity as I looked out the foggy window and saw yellow lights from the house.

"Dad, why are the lights on?"

"Oh, your mom's home early. Her flight got cancelled because of the storm. Let's go?" My dad stepped out and waited for me. I followed him outside and sloshed my way through the heavy downpour of the rain.

I quickly took my wet socks off by the time I reached the living room.

"Hey, Kim!" I looked up and saw my mom climbing down the stairs.

"Hi, ma."

"Look what I've got for you!" She sang. "Come here, boy!" _Boy? I didn't like the sound of that. _There was a thumping sound from the roof and soon, the gigantic brown dog climbed down the stairs, panting, water dripping from its fur. I was drowned of blood.

"_Daddy_!" I screamed. The rain was too loud that he couldn't hear me. I stumbled my way to the kitchen and climbed on top of the counter, breaking some of the glass plates as I did.

"Mom! _Get that thing away from me_!"

"C'mon down, Kim! He won't bite you!"

"He will, ma! _He will_!" I cried. The dog barked one loud bark and I felt my blood climb up to my head. From the living room, the dog was able to reach me on the counter in only one jump.

"_Shit_!" I dove and landed on the dining table, but the dog dove too. I jumped on the floor and crawled backwards. Suddenly, my head hit something hard. It was the wall—it was the dead end.

"_Mother_!"

"Honey, it wont bite you!"

"Wow, what a mom!" Amidst the tension I'm in, I still managed to be sarcastic. I focused back on the dog; its brown fur was already sweeping against my nose. It opened its mouth and my heart started beating like crazy.

It started to lick my mouth.

"_Pweh_! Eww! Mom! Get…this thing…away from…me!"

"Told you he's sweet!"

"_Mom_!"

"Alright, alright!" Mom reached for me and helped me up. I wiped the dog's saliva in disgust. Honestly, it didn't stink. It tasted like mint, actually, and that was freaky.

"Hey, honey. I was just…_get that dog away from Kim_!" My dad roared.

"_Relax_! She's fine." There was something furry beneath my hand, and it elevated it up to my chest. I looked at whatever it was beneath my hand. It was the dog's head—it willingly placed itself there.

"Aww! _It likes you_!"

"That dog's been wailing last night, hon. Turns out I was right, it likes Kim."

"Try patting it, honey." My mom suggested eagerly. I was in great doubt, but the dog looked up at me with seemingly sincere black eyes. It looked like it wanted me to trust him. I hesitantly patted him once. His tail wagged rapidly. I patted him again and I knelt down beside it to pat it in more places.

"I already gave him a name. Bingo. Is that fine with you, Kim?"

"Yeah, Bingo's good." I told her absentmindedly. I was too preoccupied with tickling Bingo.

Bingo suddenly walked behind me and pushed me towards the stairs.

"Mom, I think it wants to go up."

"O, sure. Here." My mom tossed me a hot paper bag. "Feed him those. He was soaking wet outside when I found him. He must be hungry."

"Wait, what about Whiskers?"

"She's in our room. Don't worry." I turned away from them and raced Bingo up the stairs to my room.

"Just wait a second, Bingo. I'll tidy up for a while." I told the dog that I somehow thought was really human. I faced the mirror and started changing. By the time I finished, I could see Bingo's reflection in the mirror—he was on my bed, his paws were covering part of his eyes, but part of it was still there, peeping. 

"Why are you covering your eyes, boy?" I laughed. I took his paws away from his eyes and placed them on the bed. I opened my closet after, and wore the night gown I found.

"I'll just fix my bag up, okay?" I placed my bag beside him and rummaged through my things. There was a neon orange paper that stood out from the dull schoolbooks and I unfolded it.

_Kim,_

_It took me a lot of courage to tell you this, so here I go. I can't help it anymore. Each time I look at you, I feel so vulnerable. I dream about you, even when I'm not asleep. You're the reason why I jump out of bed early in the morning and the reason why I can't wait to go to school more than anything else. Well, it's already pretty obvious where this letter is going. I like you. I like you too much that I fear that now, it's more than that. I think I love you, Kim, and believe me, the way I see you is more than how the other boys do. Sorry, I just had to get that off my chest. Now that I've said it all, I hope that nothing changes with the way you look at me. I just really needed to say it._

_Derek,_

A smile suddenly played on the edges of my lips. "Derek," I sighed. He was the blonde boy I used to like before Jared became my classmate. I just liked him, unlike Jared whom I really loved. But now that he said all this, it made me like him more, too much that I fear that now, it's more than that, as he puts it. I read the letter for the second and third time, the smile was still on my face.

Bingo barked out of nowhere.

"Oh, sorry, boy. Here." I opened the paper bag and threw the five chicken legs at his direction. I read the letter for the fourth time, then turned back to Bingo as I finished.

I was dumbstruck. Bingo finished all five chicken legs in merely a minute.

"Wow, you have some appetite, boy." I smoothened the brown fur on his head and scanned my room for any scratch paper I could use to pick the bones up. There was none on my bed, on my desk, on my vanity desk, but there was an intermediate sheet coated with dried mud below my closet. I reached for it and saw that it was Jared's math homework I stealthily smuggled and kissed last school year. 

"This will do." I placed it on my hand and reached for the first bone, but Bingo's raised paw stopped me. I tried doing it on the second bone, but he stopped me too.

"C'mon, boy! You don't want to live in a dirty room!" I reached for the third bone, but Bingo stopped me again, and took Jared's homework out of my hand and into his mouth. He walked to my desk, placed it there, took Derek's love letter instead and dropped it on my hand.

"I need scratch paper, Bingo. This isn't scratch." Bingo walked away and rummaged through my board game tray. He took one card in his mouth and walked to my desk to get Jared's homework too.

"What is it?" Bingo withdrew the card and the homework out of his mouth and placed it by my knees. I took the card that was placed beside Jared's name and read it. "Second chance".

"No, Bingo. No more second chances for him." Bingo fell on the floor and whimpered.

"Kim, can I come in?" My mom asked from outside.

"Sure, ma."

"Just came to check on you and Bingo." She said as she entered. "Ohh, what's this?" Her face was in a smug as she took the orange paper in her hands and read it.

"Love letter." I said sheepishly. "It's nothing, I don't like the guy, anyway." I lied.

"Oh. And what's this?" She took Jared's homework.

"Jared's homework. He's a guy I used to like. I stole it from his locker and replaced it with a correctly answered one 'cuz it's all wrong." Was it me, or did I just hear Bingo snicker?

"I can see that." My mom laughed. "Why don't you like him anymore?"

"Long story. In a nutshell, he's a jerk." My blood boiled as I remembered everything. Bingo whimpered again, but nothing seems to be wrong with him. 

"Is he a Wilson?"

"Yes."

"Oh. I'm good friends with his mom. She says her son's been out in the night just to see my daughter and he gets all these illnesses doing that. She's worried sick about Jared. She even wants me to tell you that he really does like you, more than himself with what he's doing."

"He told me that too, but I don't reckon anything he did for me to get him those stuff. He's just faking it, ma."

"I don't know, Kim. The way Susan says it, it's like he's sincere. Give the boy a chance."

"Mom, if only you knew the hell I've gone through for him, you'll understand why I don't want to give him another chance."

"Well, if you've suffered hell for him and he likes you, then you should give him a chance. That's how it works, right?"

"You know what, ma? Never mind. It's a pretty long story and I don't want to talk about it. I'm calling it a day."

"Night, Kim."

"Night, ma." I pecked my mom's cheek, turned the lights off and tucked myself to sleep. Even if my quilt was very thick, my fingertips and toes were still cold as ice. Bingo leaped from the floor and gracefully landed and slept on my bed. He cuddled with me, and cuddling him back felt warm, felt safe.


	8. Dreams

My sleep was cut short because of a loud, coughing sound

**Dreams**

Amidst the violent rainfall outside, my sleep was cut short because of loud coughing sounds. I forced my eyes half open, and I couldn't quite explain what I feel. I felt drowsy, half numb and light; the twist and turns against the sheets didn't feel very realistic. I was either half-asleep or simply dreaming.

The coughing started again, and I forced my eyes wide open. At that very moment, I realized that my cheek was against a burning hot, big and sweaty chest that glistened against the moonlight, and my arms were across a set of six steel pack abs that were just as hot, sweaty and shiny. I felt something big and warm around my shoulders, and it felt like flesh. Out of curiosity, I looked past the chest and saw Jared's face instead of Bingo's.

"_Jared_?" I gasped. Seeing him here was impossible, so I was positively sure that this is a dream.

"I'm sorry, if I woke you up." He apologized. It may sound stupid, but I said it, anyway. "It's okay. This is just a dream, you didn't wake me up."

"Uhh, yeah." His eyebrows pulled together and my stomach started twisting. "Let's go with that." He grinned. The silly grin on his face was abruptly wiped off when he coughed one more time, droplets blood spewed out of his mouth and trickled down his lips.

"_Jared, are you okay_?" I wiped the blood off his lips

"Yeah. Just don't mind that." He softly placed my hands back on his stomach and wiped the blood off himself.

"You're not okay."

"I am. This is just a dream, remember?" I suddenly felt confused deep inside. A person in a dream who knows he's in it? That's odd.

"Dream or no dream, you're not okay. Stay there, I'll get you some medicine." I got on my feet and headed for the door. From the corner of my eye, I could see Jared struggle out of bed but gave up easily. He was too weak.

I went downstairs and grabbed the first aid kit, which was just above the refrigerator. I also got a bowl of ice-cold water, a sponge, and a glass of ice-cold water too.

"Drink this." I handed him the glass and the yellow capsule that my dad drinks whenever he spits blood. I watched him gulp it down, and my eyes widened in shock as I saw him finish all the water up in that one gulp.

"I better get you some more water."

"No, I'm fine. Seeing you works better than drinking water."

"Wow, dream Jared's just as plastic as the real one." I muttered to myself. "I'll still get you water." I went back to the kitchen and brought one pitcher of water up to my room.

"Here."

"Thanks. But I was serious about you working better than water."

"Sure, sure." I said sarcastically as I kneeled beside him to dip the sponge inside the bowl. By the time I was sure that the sponge was cold enough, I gently placed it on Jared's forehead.

"I must be the luckiest man on earth. I've got such a beautiful nurse." He sounded weak.

"Beautiful nurse my ass." I laughed. I took the fever syrup out of the kit after, and fed him a spoonful.

"You know, I'll be needing more than that." Jared took the bottle from me as I was about to seal it and gulped the remainder of it.

"_Are you mad!? You could get an overdose_!"

"I won't." He smiled. "Go back to sleep, these things will heal me up, and sleeping with you tonight will heal me up for good."

"Sleeping with me tonight, that sounds so wrong."

"Don't look at it that way." He snickered. I took the sponge and dipped it in the bowl for one more time.

"Good night." I placed the sponge back on his forehead and tucked myself back to sleep.

"I love you." Before I was given a chance to react, he firmly took my small face in his big, hot hands and tenderly pressed his soft, warm lips against mine. It stayed there for so long, and when he pulled away, I was debating with myself.

_It's just a dream, you could say it._ "I love you too, very much." I leaned in to return the kiss, hoping that it was just as heavenly as the kiss he gave me. I placed my head back on his chest after.

"I was made to love you more." He whispered in my ear.

"Another missing hiker." My dad clucked his tongue in disapproval. Ever since he turned the car radio on, the Quileute radio keeps on talking about missing hikers and gigantic bears. "That's why some rangers from Forks are coming to the fair."

"What fair?"

"The Quileute Elementary Annual School Fair. A lot of people will come. It's been ages since the last time they had one."

Fairs. Something social, and when it's something social, it's something I hate. "Oh."

"Honey, are you okay?" The question caught me off guard. "Yeah. Yeah, I am."

"Something's bothering you. Is it Jared?" I automatically shot my dad a surprised look, and wished that I shouldn't have when I realized what I just did. "It _is_ about Jared. No need to deny it, Kim."

"What made you say that?"

"You should see his papers. Your name's written all over the back…and his notebook, don't get me started with his notebook."

"What's with his notebook?" I sounded like I was pleading.

"Poems, really epic ones. The boy's gotta gift. He got the words right out of my mouth when I think about your mother. Your mom even told me about his little sacrifices." He chuckled. These were the moments that I terribly hated—when your parents talk about your love life right in front of your face. It felt irritatingly awkward.

"I don't like him, dad."

"Good. 'Cuz maybe he likes you for the plain reason of you being prettier. Those are the people you should avoid. You should find people who will always love you, pretty or not, just like how your mom loves me." It was a good thing my mom wasn't here now. They usually end up making out if my dad gets started with that subject. Other than that, dad's words were rubbing themselves against my brain. I should stop liking Jared because I'll admit it, there's still some feelings left.

"See you later, honey." The car pulled to a stop across the schoolyard.

"Bye, dad." I climbed out of the car and ran fast towards the school to avoid getting wet. My fastest wasn't fast enough—I was soaking halfway through.

I didn't know why, but the rain suddenly stopped pouring—on my head, at least. I looked up and saw a black umbrella held on my head, and not too long after that, I looked at its holder.

"Hi, Kim." Jared smiled. It was wrong, having the most desired guy on campus hold an umbrella up for me.

"Oh. Hi." I continued walking; the umbrella was still following me. I turned around to tell Jared that I didn't need it, but I saw that he wasn't even sparing a space beneath the umbrella for himself. The raindrops left dark grey blots on his light grey muscle shirt.

"Hey, use your umbrella. You might get sick."

"It's too small. It can only hold one person."

"I'm fine without it."

"No way am I gonna let you get wet." So he wants it the hard way, huh? I ran to the right, he followed. I ran in circles, he followed too.

"Fine." I groaned in defeat. "Let's just try to share it…so you won't get wet." He inched closer to me on the same second, got a firm grip on my waist, and we walked together towards the school.

He folded the umbrella close when we were by the classroom door, then I caught up with his pacing, just to show him gratitude.

"What the?" I blurted out when I saw him take Stacey's seat.

"I have bad eyesight, so my mom requested the teachers to let me sit somewhere in the middle." He said with a mischievous smirk, a wink accompanying it.

"You're impossible."

"Hello, class!" Ms. Samson said out of nowhere. "Today, we will be playing a fun game!" Everyone started to get uneasy. Ms. Samson, unlike my dad, was the funniest and most loved teacher, and whenever she says she has a fun game for us, it really is fun.

"Well, I'll explain its connection to our topic for tomorrow so let's just concentrate on the game for now. The game's called 'The _Blind_ Bachelor.'" As expected, the girls shrieked their heads off when they heard the word 'bachelor'.

"You will pick a bachelor, then we'll blind fold him. Then, we'll pick five girls to play the game. The bachelor will ask her some personal questions, ask the contestants to do stuff to please him and on the final round, the contestants will prove themselves by convincing him that he should pick her. The winner, which is the girl the bachelor chooses, will get a chance to date him during lunch. Lunch is on me, of course." She chuckled. "Are your ready?"

"_Yes_!" Everyone shouted, even the boys.

"Okay! Now, who's the bachelor?"

"_Jared_!" They all said at freakishly the same time.

"Okay! Jared please step out of the room so we can select our five contestants." I turned to look at him, and abruptly looked away when I saw him looking at me.

"Go Jared!" Stacey playfully elbowed him. Everyone stood up and pushed him out of the room.


	9. Jealousy

Jealousy

**Jealousy**

"Alright, let's pick our five contestants! Any volunteers? The first five who will volunteer will be automatically in." My lips tightened as seemingly thousands of hands shot themselves in the air. There was a huge part of my brain that was telling me to keep my hands to myself, but there was this tad bit part that yelled, "Raise your freaking hand!"

"Okay, the first ones I saw are Rachel, Rebecca," Ugh. The Black twins, also known as Stacey's loyal pose. "Stacey, Emma and…Mark."

"_Mark?!_" I found myself gasping with the others.

"Well, I said the first five ones, and he was the last one. Besides, don't you want a little twist?" Ms. Samson's face turned into a big smug.

"Jared, here I come!" Mark puckered his lips and made kissing sounds.

"Alright, contestants, please go to the platform now. Kim, could you please call your seatmate in and blindfold him with this?" I gave her a mere nod as I stood up to receive the yellow bandana.

"Kim!" Jared rose from the hallway bench in a snap. "Are you a contestant? Listen, if you are, squeeze my hand back if I squeeze yours, okay?" The classroom door suddenly creaked open. "Hey, no talking or spilling the beans!" Mrs. Samson's head peeped.

"Yes, miss." I croaked. No doubt, I felt sad, but why? I shook my head in confusion, and placed the bandana on Jared's eyes before my conscience tells me what I don't even want to hear.

"He's ready."

"Good, bring him in."

"This way." I trudged towards the classroom.

"Kim, you'll have to take me there. I can't see, remember?" Jared said while laughing. His thunder-like laugh echoed through the empty hallway.

"Right." I went back for him, then my heart started beating like crazy when one of his gigantic hands were raised, waiting to take mine. I hesitantly slithered my hand on top of it, and pulled him towards the door.

"Ahh." He gave one long sigh.

"What?"

"Nothing. Your hands, they're so soft." I didn't mind him, so I continued pulling his feverish hands towards the room. Shrieks of all sorts pierced my ears as I kicked the door open.

"_Are you ready_?" Ms. Samson asked with much jubilation.

"_Yes_!"

"Then let's play the game!" I waited for the screams to disperse as I made my way back to my seat. Jared was seated on a chair in the middle, looking as clueless as possible.

"Alright, bachelor. Ask the contestants any personal info that will get you to know them better."

"Hmm." He rubbed his chin. "Okay, do you have a pet dog? What is its name?"

"We'll start with contestant number one, then two, then so on." Ms. Samson interrupted. "Okay R-I mean contestant number one. Answer his question."

"Well, my brother Jacob has one. I don't know if that's counted." Rachel answered through a red microphone that changed her girly voice into a robotic one.

"Nope." Rebecca went straight to the point, with the same voice as Rachel's.

"I have a dog named Bingo." Stacey said as she twirled her hair. Wow, our dogs have the same names. It must be really common. I know two more people in La Push who own a dog named Bingo. Part of Jared's lips curled up into a half smile.

"I'm allergic." Emma said in an instant.

"Well," Mark said in the same robotic voice, a pitch higher and gayer than the rest. "I had a dog named Brutus, but my dad shot him dead." The class laughed out loud. Mark's dad was pretty famous in La Push…in a bad way, that is. He's a bald, fat man who often has a high blood. I always see him chase some stray cats with a gun, and the way his red cheeks vibrate violently when he swears made me pee in my pants when I was twelve.

"Alright, next round." Ms. Samson cut the laughing short. "Bachelor, please ask the contestants to do anything that will please you. Like, give them a situation or something."

"I have one." Jared said immediately. "Say, I have a really high fever and then I start coughing blood." I froze on that second. That's exactly what happened to him in my dream last night. "How would you make me feel better?"

"Number one." Ms. Samson jerked her head towards Jared. Rachel walked up to him in a slutty way, and then started massaging his hardcore back. My heart was thumping as I waited for Jared's pleased reaction. His lips stayed straight.

"Two." Rebecca slyly walked to Jared, helped him up and strained him in a python's hug. My hands clenched to a fist, even if it was against my will. Jared didn't react one bit.

"Three." Stacey went miming, looking like she was carrying a bowl and a glass of water in her hands. She acted like she was dipping something into the bowl, then she placed it on Jared's forehead. Then, she acted like she was giving Jared a capsule, and handed him the pretend glass of water. Jared's lips broke into a full grin, and the urge to charge and slap Stacey surged through my body.

"Four." Emma mimed too, like she was piercing needles through random parts of Jared. Acupuncture.

"And last." Mark walked to Jared like a stripper, hips and hands swaying in an exaggerated way. He grabbed Jared's chin and pecked his lips.

"_Eew!!_" Some of us exclaimed, the others burst into laughter. "Yuck! Yuck!" Jared wiped his lips with his shirt, like a fatal germ was on there.

"Mark." Ms. Samson eyed Mark in a very dark way. Jared suddenly looked like he was going to barf. "That was _Mark?!_"

"I'm going to have to deal with you later, Mister Nichols. Please go back to your seat. Moving on. Jared, please ask the girls why you have to pick them."

"Why should I pick you?" He asked, still wiping his lips in disgust.

"'Cuz I've been in love with you since kindergarten!"

"We belong together."

"I don't know, Jared. It's actually your loss if you don't pick me." Stacey raised her eyebrows and smiled maniacally. Jared squeezed her hand, and then she squeezed it back. _Damn it. She is dead meat._

"I never had a boyfriend."

"_What?!_" Everyone reacted violently at what Emma said. Was it wrong? To never have had a boyfriend? Hello, I've never had a boyfriend too!

"Because of what Mark did, he is disqualified from the game. Now, Jared, pick your girl. Let me just remind everyone that the girl you'll pick will get a lunch date with you."

"Number three, please." He said without even sparing a second to think. Stacey threw her arms around him, and planted little kisses on his lips. Blood boiled from beneath my skin, and I felt my cheeks warm up like fire. Jared eagerly took the bandana off. His eyes widened in as he saw Stacey, maybe out of happiness. His head turned to me, but I rolled my eyes and looked away.

O.O.O.O

"What's up, Kim?" I took my eyes off the table where Jared and Stacey were. Derek was right in front of me, his dirty blonde hair in sharp contrast against his white shirt.

"Hi. Umm, nothing much."

"Did you…get my letter?" He asked sheepishly. The way his pale cheeks flushed pink washed my angst away.

"Yeah. Thank you."

"You're not grossed out? Freaked out? Pissed?"

"No." I laughed. His jade green eyes were suddenly full of lustre.

"Uhh, do you have anything to do this Friday night?" My stomach lurched. He's asking me out.

"No, not really. Why?"

"Umm, do you mind going to the elementary fair with me? If…it's okay with you."

"Sure!" What the hell did I just say? I hate fairs, why did I just agree to go to one? It's too late to take it back now.

"I'll pick you up at six, is that okay?"

"Wait, you don't even know where I live." I chuckled.

"Yes, I do. I went to your house once, when I submitted a late project to your dad."

"Oh. Well, six it is." I flashed him a smile.

"Cool." He nodded. "So, see you Friday night?"

"See you." I told him breathlessly. He rose from his seat, leaving me alone, once again; but he turned around to wave at me. I waved at him back.


	10. Fair

**Fair**

I shook my head in disappointment. Bingo didn't take one bite of his Alpo.

"Dad, he still doesn't want to eat it."

"Here, boy!" My dad tossed him a hamburger steak and I watched him eat it in two bites. He stood up on his feet, begging for more, and the height that nearly reached the roof nearly threw me aback.

"Woah. I bet Bingo's just as big as those bears who killed the missing hikers."

"Maybe." I told dad; but deep inside, I had a strange feeling that Bingo was bigger than those bears. After one more toss of a steak, Bingo walked away from my dad and rested his head on my legs. I watched his eyes slowly blink close as I gently stroked his head down to his tail. I don't know what I'll become of without him.

"I love you." I told him as I planted kisses on his furry head. He lifted his head up and playfully licked my cheeks, then placed his huge paws in my hands as he rested his head again.

There was suddenly a knocking sound by the door.

"I'll get it." I carefully placed Bingo's head on the floor, afraid to wake him up. As I flung the door open, I saw a very large man.

He reminds me a lot of Paul and Jared—tall, muscular, intimidating, only this time, the man looked a few years older and carried himself with such grace and prestige.

"Hello there." He smiled at me, and the low, booming voice nearly knocked me off my feet.

"H-hello." I forced the word out of my mouth. There was suddenly a violent, growling sound from behind. I suddenly became afraid of Bingo all over again.

"I'm Sam Uley. Just call me Sam." The name rang a bell. He used to be one grade higher than me, and he was very famous in La Push because of a commercial ad he did before. Months after his commercial, his fame vanished like a bubble.

"Honey, who is it?"

"It's Sam Uley." The chair my dad was sitting on made a screeching sound as he stubled his way to the door.

"Samuel!"

"Mr. Bennett?"

"How are you? Please, come in." My dad took him by the hand and led him to the living room. Bingo's growl grew even more menacing, but one glower from Sam, for some unexplainable reason, shut him up.

"So, what brought you here?"

"Well, I'm here to get my dog, sir." The world collapsed on my feet_. He's Bingo's true owner?_ My chest felt heavier as the thought of letting Bingo go washed through me.

"Bingo?"

"Yes, sir, if that's what you call him."

"Oh, what's his true name?"

"Jared." My eyes widened in the coincidence. His name was Jared, all this time.

"Wow. Like my student, Jared Wilson." He chuckled.

"I'm really sorry if I have to take him, sir. You see, he's not an ordinary dog. He's sort of a guard, and we need him now."

"I see. What breed is he?"

"Alaskan wolf."

"Wow, he's too enormous to be an Alaskan wolf."

"That's what everyone tells me." For the first time, Sam Uley laughed. "I know your daughter has grown very fond of him, but I have to take him now. He's just not meant to be a pet, and like what I said earlier, he's a guard dog…and we really need him now. I'm really sorry, Kim." For a split second, I wondered how he knew my name.

"It's okay." I croaked.

"Jared…" Sam jerked his hand up and Bingo--or Jared--unwillingly stood up and whimpered his way out. I was whimpering too, deep inside, as my first dog walked away.

"Umm." Sam Uley turned around and looked back at me. "He could still visit you, some other time, just not now."

"Okay. Thank you."

"No problem. And thank you for taking good care of him. He really enjoyed his stay here." He turned around and walked away, my eyes still following my Bingo.

"It's okay, honey! You still have Whiskers!" My dad placed my black cat on my lap, but I still wasn't happy. Why did I like Bingo, the dog I took care of for two days, more than Whiskers, the cat I had since childhood?

I tried patting her—her fur wasn't as bushy as Bingo's, her body was too bony and small unlike Bingo's broad, huggable and warm one. It's been less than a minute, and I already miss him so badly.

o.o.o.o

"_Mother_!" I groaned at my mom who was hugging my closet, making a complete fool out of herself.

"I won't allow you to go to the fair in anything else but _that_." She insisted, and I screamed my head off when she stuck her tongue out like a preschooler. "It's not that bad, honey. Go to the mirror and see for yourself." I rolled my eyes as I trudged towards the mirror. The white sleeveless shirt and the skinny jeans exposed my stick figure.

"I look like a walking skeleton."

"No you don't! You look like a supahmodel!" My mom mockingly flipped her hair and acted like she was walking on a runway as she approached me.

"I'll do your hair."

"_No_!" It was too late. She already started combing it and tied my long hair into a pretty high ponytail.

"Aww! You look so gorgeous! You're the prettiest girl in La Push!"

"Yeah, right." I disagreed as I added my own personal touch. I took my side bangs out of the stack and let it rest on one side.

"That's better. You look even more beautiful!"

"Honey, Derek's here!" My dad called from outside. My stomach was churning wildly, but it honestly wasn't close to how it churns when I used to like Jared.

"Go, go, go!" My mom pushed me out of my own room and I ran out of the house.

:"Hi." I waved at Derek as I stepped into the porch. He was wearing white too, only with the football team jacket.

"Ready?"

"Yeah." We climbed down the porch stairs together and made our way down the steep, narrow path that curved down to First Beach.

"Your house has a nice view. I've always wanted to live on top of a cliff."

"Thank you. But I'd rather live near the shore, really."

"It gets kinda boring." He said as we walked farther into the dark. There was nothing to hear but the scratching sound our shoes made, the cricketing of the crickets and the croaking of the frogs.

"Aren't you scared?" I asked him to break the silence.

"Huh?"

"We're in a forest. The gigantic bears might maul us like the other hikers."

"You know, my grandpa says the bears didn't cause the missing hikers."

"Then what?"

"He says it's a vampire." There was a long pause, and then we broke into laughter.

"I don't believe him, really. I don't even know why the old people around here believe in those shit."

"Yeah."

"My grandpa even says that werewolves exist too. He says they could be anywhere, even in our school. He even says that he suspects one of our classmates to be one."

"Wow." I chuckled with him. "I know it's stupid, but I really wish it was all true. I really wish that vampires and werewolves exist."

"Really? Me too. I've always wanted to be a werewolf…ever since I was a kid. It's just so cool, how you could morph into a dog." The painful memory of Bingo came back. He was more than a dog; sometimes I even doubt that he's really a human deep inside. _Was he a werewolf?_ I dismissed that idea right away. As much as I wanted it to be real, vampires and werewolves don't exist.

"Cool. We're near." Derek's voice abruptly brought me out of my thoughts.

"How could you tell?"

"I can hear the music. Listen." We paused for a while. I heard faint Fergie songs playing from below.

"Can you hear it?"

"My hump. My hump, my hump, my hump." I sang with it.

"My lovely lady lump." Derek sang the next line off key.

"Check it out." We both chorused.

"Wanna run for it?" He asked me.

"One, two, _three_!" We both ran down the cliff, the force of gravity making us run faster even without effort. The song grew louder and louder as our running prolonged. Soon, we saw yellow lights several steps ahead of us. We were near the end of the trail.

Our shoes were already half buried under the brown sand and the salty sea breeze blew past us. The fair wasn't how I expected it to be. It was beautiful in the extremes. Torches of fire were set vivid against the beach, the yellow, sparkling Christmas lights were entwined around the trees, a variety of colourful booths that stood side by side and its players were everywhere, the tons of people ran around the shore, the bass from the loud music thumped under my feet—it all brought a rush of adrenaline.

"This is…this is good." I told Derek as my eyes wandered up into the star-sprinkled night sky. For some weird reason, he laughed at me.

"This isn't _the_ fair, Kim. The action's not here."

"Really?"

"I'll take you there." He took my hand and pulled me past the scurrying people, the long array of fun booths and food booths.

"Oh, sorry." He hit a girl wearing a jester hat and a gown on top of her shirt and jeans. The dress-me-up booth probably caught her.

We whirred past the eating families, the couples cuddling by the shore, the unfortunate souls behind the wires of the jail booth and many more things that were just in the corner of my eye. There were people everywhere, too many that I was sure it wasn't just the La Push population.

"The action's _here_." I was face to face with the paper heart-coated Marriage booth. How could the action happen in a booth where strangers get paired up?

"Oh."

"Not there, Kim. _Here_." He spun me around and the adrenaline rush grew bigger.

Planks of wood were elevated on top of the beach. Everything was on there—the carousel, the bumper cars, the Ferris wheel, the caterpillar, the octopus, the cable cars, the Viking and the music. I didn't know where to start.

"Let's go! _Let's go_!"

"Alright!" Derek chuckled as we ran towards that place and climbed the steep, makeshift stairs that led there.

I could hear the screams of the people, the random sounds the rides made, the music that was at its loudest, and the talking of VJs.

Where's that talking coming from?" Derek spun me around for one more time. Set in the middle of all the fun was a big stage, two people talking on top and several teenagers listening below.

"I hope you don't mind, but I'm going to be interviewed onstage at 7:30. Are you okay if I leave you for a few minutes?"

"Sure, sure."

"I'll meet you by the cotton candy stand after. It's near the jail booth."

"Derek!" Someone called from behind. We both turned around and saw one of his football teammates running towards us.

"Derek. You have to go backstage now. They'll be telling you your questions so you could answer them later."

"I can't. Kim's here." His teammate leaned closer and whispered something in his ear. Too bad his voice was too loud that I could hear it. "Hicks is doing your interview." I rolled my eyes. Blaire Hicks was that girl who used to live here but moved to L.A. because she got discovered.

"Uhh. Listen, Kim. Louie says that I'll lose my position in the team if I'll be late. So…see you later?"

"Sure." I flashed him a fake smile. "Bye." I watched him run off with his friend. "Jerk."

"Kim?" Amidst all the noise, the voice still managed to be clear.

"Paul!" I exclaimed as I saw my former wimpy best friend who has now turned into one of the largest men I have ever seen. He was nibbling on a hotdog; a lot of mayo was on his cheeks.

"Why are your lips damn red?"

"Oh. I ate a snow cone. Who're you with?"

"I was with Derek ten seconds ago, now I'm all alone."

"That ass. Come with me for a while." He offered me his arm and I tucked mine in, just like before.

"What d'ya wanna ride?" He asked as he threw the hotdog stick.

"Anything."

"Are you fine with the octopus?"

"Hell yeah." He automatically handed me one, orange ticket, and then we headed to the right for the octopus.

"What do you know? We're the last passengers!"

"Cool." He told me blankly. I looked up at him—he was suddenly pale.

"Aww, _c'mon_! Don't be such a pussy, Paul!"

"Fine, fine. I won't let a girl beat me at this." He said as we headed boldly for the last container. The only thing that spelled life from death was one steel bar that hung loose.

"I think I'm gonna back out. We could die, here."

"I told you!" It was too late. We were suddenly going higher, the container spinning around as we did. We were halfway up the cliffs. I felt like I was going to fall and die. If this was just the beginning, then what more later?

"Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no." Paul chanted as we descended and ascended on the same second. It happened again and again, and my blood was being taken to random parts.

"Paul, if I die, you could have my Darth Vader voice changer."

"And Kim, if I die, Jared loves you like hell." Before I was given time to react, our container was swashing in mid-air, our heads were up one second then down on the next. It went on and on, faster and faster. I was going to barf any minute.

"_Damn iiiiiiiiiiit_!" Paul screamed in a very high pitched voice as the route changed randomly. He threw his arms around me, screaming directly into my ear, suffocating me.

"_Shit, Paul! Stop it! You're crushing my eardrums! I can't breath_!" Thank God the ride already stopped before I could even barf on his head. We climbed down the ride as our container reached the ground and it felt like I left my soul up there. The fair was spinning around, and both Paul and I fell on the ground.

We looked at each other and a smile slowly crept on our lips. "Let's do it again!" We both screamed.


	11. Luck

**Luck**

"Hey, want Coke to go with that burger?" I withdrew my eyes from the scrumptious burger and faced Paul. "Sure."

"One more Coke, please." In an instant, the lady handed Paul a tall glass of cold Coke. She looked dazed, like Paul was sucking her attention in or something. From the corner of my eye, I saw Paul wink at the girl, looked at her maliciously from top to bottom then wiped his lips slowly with his tongue. Disturbing. But that was Paul. He will always be a player.

"So, where do you wanna sit? Here or by the shore." I assessed the chairs that were near the burger stand. Stacey and the Black twins were seated on one of them. "Shore."

We sat on the sand, just beside a flaming torch. Its flaming yellow light gently kissed our faces. If there were a random bystander, we'd definitely look like a couple to him. We were really just friends, nothing more, nothing less.

The crashing of the waves somehow brought a sense of tranquillity amidst the chaotic fair. So did the gentle and salty sea breeze that blew through us. From a colourful, frenzied mood, we suddenly turned sentimental.

I looked at Paul after taking three bites and a sip of Coke. There was awkward silence so I faced him to say something.

His eyes were fixed at a certain point. When I looked at what he was looking, I only saw a family munching on chocolate apples a few meters beside us.

"You're being emo over a family?"

"No! Not them!"

"Then what?"

"Them." His long finger pointed at the people before the family. It was a couple, and they were making out.

"So, you need someone to make out with? You're sick."

"You're so superficial, Kim. It's not _that_."

"Then what?"

"I feel really lonely, you know. I need someone."

"You've got a lot of girls running after you. And you hit on them."

"Yeah, I know. But none of them have _it_."

"Have what?"

"Something special. They're all the same." For a second, I was beginning to be afraid of Paul. I've never seen him be so serious. I think he's possessed, but part of me knows that he isn't. He is human, anyway.

"Well, don't force yourself to fall in love. You're eighteen. You've got plenty more years to look."

"You won't understand, Kim. There's someone out there for me, and I need her now." Now, Paul's eyes were fixed on the sky. His large Adam's apple quivered as he gulped misery in.

"I'm here. I could be your friend."

"Not as a friend."

"I don't see a drastic difference, really."

"Gah! You won't understand. Almost all my friends already found their imprint…I mean the one for them. I'm kinda left out. Sometimes I even wonder if I will see her or not."

"You're pressuring yourself. So what if they have a girlfriend? And I'm sure they just think she's the one for them. They're just blinded by infatuation."

"Never mind. You really won't understand. Jared's lucky." At the very mention of the name, my mind flew back from a place with no problems to the real world. I don't really know if I like Jared. I hate him, but I don't. He tells me that he wants me, and I like hearing that, but I know it's a lie. Why did I have to know him, anyway?

"Why do you say so?"

"He found you already."

"He doesn't like me, Paul. He's faking it."

"Yes, he does. He loves you so much that he'd jump a bullet for you. No joke. He dreams about you day and night, you're driving him crazy. You're driving _us_ crazy."

"Who's _us_?"

"His friends. I know he made you suffer, but you're making him suffer enough already. Just answer him."

"I don't like Jared." I half lied.

"If you liked a person once, you could like him again. He loves you. You're his world. Did you know that he almost committed suicide because of you?"

"_What?!_"

"Yeah. That's how much he _needs_ you." I hated Paul. I hated Paul a lot. Because of what he said, I already admitted it to myself. I like Jared. I love Jared. And I'm happy that he loves me too. I could see myself stopping him from jumping of a cliff or hanging himself. I love him, and I have to be with him now.

"Oh, time flies so fast." Paul stopped my imagining that was already going wild.

"What?"

"It's 7:45. Fifteen minutes 'till my band plays."

"_You have a band?!_" I accidentally blurted out.

"_You didn't know?!"_

"No!" For a guy, Paul was very humble.

"Well, we're playing tonight. If you can, watch us onstage."

"Sure, sure. Let's go!" And off Paul and I went. We ran as fast as we could, or was that just me? I never expected Paul to be in a band. And it would be live entertainment to see him strumming a guitar, doing a head bang and all those stuff rock stars do.

"What do you play?" I asked him as we climbed the steep stairs that led to the stage and the rides.

"I'm on vocals."

"_You could sing?!_" Now I was getting too excited. Paul singing is just…unexpected.

"Everyone can." We were near the center already, but the thick crowd of people who were watching another band hindered me. In fact, where Paul and I were standing right now is the nearest we could get to the stage.

"Damn."

"You give up too easily." He chuckled. In an instant, he shoved the people away, all which got in our way. There were yelps, complaints and swearing, but they were all cut short when they saw that it was Paul who was pushing them.

"Here you go. First row for the VIP." He gestured at the spot nearest the stage and bowed.

"Wow, you really shouldn't have."

"If there's one person here who needs to see our show, you're that person. Hey, tell me if I did good, okay?"

"Okay." And at that, Paul left for the backstage and pushed more people. I was left with the band who was currently playing, and they sucked. Their sound system was too ear piercing and was so bad, or maybe it was just their playing. For one second, the guitarist dropped his pick, then stopped playing for a while to reach for it. The vocalist forgets his lines at times and forces the notes out of his throat. The nerve that looked like it was going to explode any second proved it. I honestly didn't know why everyone was jumping and shouting to their music. It's a total waste of their groupie energy.

"Alright, folks! That was Banana Split!" The emcee said as the song came to an end. Loud cheering came after it. It was Stacey's younger sister, Kelly. She's like Stacey's copy, except that she's much less bitchy than she is.

"And our next band is from our very own Quileute High! Please welcome…_The Werewolves_!" At that instant, Paul climbed the stage. How could I have been so blind all this time? He looked like a rock star, especially now that the colourful lights are on him. Three other guys who looked familiar followed him. Then there was Jared, wearing a tight black shirt that says "For Rent" with an arrow pointing to his pants. The yellow light that touched his face made him look dreamier. You could only see those kinds of guys on T.V. or in those air brushed magazine pictures. Now I got a full view of his muscles, his broad chest, his abs and those intimidating blue nerves that curved from his arms down to his knuckles. He loves me, and imagining that god beside someone like me disgusted my every gut. I didn't deserve him, and he didn't deserve to suffer for someone so human as I am.

"So, please introduce yourselves." Kelly gave the microphone to Paul, but I think she was too busy looking at one of them.

"I'm Paul on vocals." As he finished, a surge of unexplainable deafening yells went through me. It was so ear piercing and loud that it seemed like it pushed me an inch closer to the stage.

"This is Embry on lead guitar." Another surge of deafening yells went through.

"Quil on rhythm guitar." And another.

"Jacob on bass." And another.

"Jared on drums. And another. This time I was disturbed. There were too many females who screamed for him. Many are prettier and more impeccable than I am. It made me hate myself more. So many girls, and I was the one he chose. I'm unworthy, and I made him suffer. I should have taken him right away, like any other girl would; but that was still wrong because I wasn't even worthy enough to touch him. Instead of being happy, I felt guilty, like I didn't have the right to live.

"And why do you call yourselves 'The Werewolves'?"

"Because we are werewolves. We just don't want to show you people." I broke into laughter with the crowd, amidst the fact that I hated myself.

"I'm serious! We _are_ werewolves!"

"Sure, you are. So, what's your first song?"

"This song is called 'Victoria'. She's a vampire. We know that with her acute senses, she could hear this song right now. So Victoria, if you're listening, this song's for you. I love you, Vicky." Paul didn't make any sense. We knew he was joking, but his joke wasn't at all funny and he looked like he was serious. But that was typical Paul. Very weird and not understandable.

The intro started, and it was awesome. It was like listening to a cd. It was hard to believe that it was actually live. The crowd started jumping in the intro already, what more when the verses come?

It did come soon. The first line went, "O, Vicky. Won't you make out with me?" Then the rest was about how she should forget some guy named James who was now dead and how she'd have a nice time with Paul in bed. It was gross. Whoever Vicky was, I'd be really insulted if I were her. The lyrics are just too explicit. I couldn't imagine Paul thinking about those nasty thoughts. Even if the lyrics were gross (for a good goody like me, at least), the band still managed to make it a good song because of Paul's impeccable voice and the great instrumentals.

I focused on Jared, making the rest of the hideously written lyrics a blur in the background. The way his eyes were so intense as he pounds with his sticks, the way he bites his lips when his solo comes, the way his chest rises and falls—it was all too much to handle. I started to hate myself more. I couldn't even play an instrument. Heck, I don't even have a talent. Why did I turn someone like him down?

"Wow, just wow!" Kelly approached them as the Jared pounded at his cymbals.

"That was a great song! Wasn't it, guys?" And the crowd became frenzied. Random girls would shout "I love Paul" or "I love Jared" and all those other guys in the band. It was crazy. I've never seen so much fan craze before. They all sounded like they were being raped, especially the girls. I looked behind me. It looked like the whole fair was here already.

"Our next song is called "Laurent". He's a vampire too. We killed him the other day in Forks. See you in hell, bro." And the song started. This time, the intro was more of drum solos, really fast ones. As Jared pounded on the drums so quickly, I felt like he was pounding my heart. It was beating that fast.

The song was about how this guy named Laurent was so crunchy. Most of the song described what he looked like when they tore his clothes off. Everyone seemed to love the band, even if they never took a song seriously. It just went on and on, Paul's back flips, Quil and Embry's guitar spins, Jacob's jumping and Jared's stick spinning and tossing. They were great. This song was shorter than the first one, and the crowd begged for more as it came to an end.

" Thanks, guys! We love you all! Well, anyway, this last song will be sung by our drummer Jared, so I'll be taking over the drums right now." Jared…singing? My heart thumped so fast as he handed Paul his sticks and approached the mic. I was just at his feet, and his slight sweating complimented his model look. All that's left to do is to bow down to him.

"This song is by Billy Joel. It's called, 'She's Always a Woman to Me. Every word in it perfectly describes how I feel for this girl. Well, you know who you are. I love you and I don't know I'll ever live without you." I could melt any minute. My stomach was lurching. I wanted to tell him more. I wanted to hold him close to me. I needed to.

"Aww!" The crowd chorused. I was afraid. I couldn't let them know it was me.

Then the song started. It lost the entire hardcore rock thing. It was mellow, and the instrumentals are what you'd exactly hear when you're in love.

_She can kill with a smile, she can wound with her eyes,  
She can ruin your faith with her casual lies,  
And she only reveals what she wants you to see.  
She hides like a child but she's always a woman to me.  
She can lead you to love, she can take you or leave you,  
She can ask for the truth but she'll never believe you,  
And she'll take what you give her as long as it's free,  
Yeah she steals like a thief but she's always a woman to me.  
Oh, she takes care of herself, she can wait if she wants,  
She's ahead of her time.  
Oh, and she never gives out and she never gives in,  
She just changes her mind.  
And she'll promise you more than the garden of Eden  
then she'll carelessly cut you and laugh while you're bleeding,  
But she brings out the best and the worst you can be.  
Blame it all on yourself cause she's always a woman to me. _

Then the very mesmerizing instrumental started. Everyone was quite teary eyed, perhaps because they always wanted someone to sing this song to her. Other were already slow dancing. I was blown away. I never thought someone would give these words to me. I was too lucky. I already love Jared, and I don't know what to do if this were all a dream._  
_

_Oh, she takes care of herself, she can wait if she wants,  
She's ahead of her time.  
Oh, and she never gives out and she never gives in,  
She just changes her mind.  
She is frequently kind and she's suddenly cruel,  
She can do as she pleases, she's nobody's fool,  
But she can't be convicted, she's earned her degree,  
And the most she will do is throw shadows at you  
But she's always a woman to me.  
_


End file.
